You Won’t Believe What I Discovered This Weekend!

Oh Sweet Interpreter, I have made a huge discovery this week, huge! I never really saw it in myself, but apparently I talk too much. No really, I talk way too much. Especially to store clerks and such.

I did myself in this weekend. Saturday morning as we were getting ready for our Leif Erikkson Day celebration on Sunday, we realized that we, Anna and I, had forgotten to ask Dirt to stop on his way home Friday and pick up Salmon. Anna and I had picked up the Korv on Wednesday when we had gone to get her quail and our search for Lutefisk had failed. We hadn’t gotten the go ahead from the resident Viking to fore go the lute and replace it with salmon yet, and then I forgot to remind Dirt to pick the salmon up on his way home.

So there I was, in little tiny Yelm, no Vikings in site, not a sign of a Swede or a Norwegian around, not even a Finn or a Dane. I stroll to the back of Safeway after getting a special little treat at the Starbuck counter inside, ya I know, it isn’t the same, the Safeway gals don’t make ’em like the folks at Starbucks but heck I can’t get the kind of entertainment I got that morning at Safeway from inside my own car at the Real Starbuck’s drive through.

So I get to the back where the meat and fish counter is, and… What? You want to know what happened up at the front of the store first? Sweet interpreter, for you anything.

But it really wasn’t much, just a mom that should have her mom license revoked. Actually I think she only had a learner’s permit and she was failing fast. Trust me, she was way louder than her toddler and four-year old were even thinking of being. In fact I was having a hard time even hearing anything coming out of them.

The capper was when she threatened the little ones with their grandparents. Yep, she threatened that if they didn’t straighten up she was going to take them to meet up with “Nana and Pappa at Walmart” and they would be disappointed and not put up with their naughtiness.

So after that little show of total parental ignorance, thank you public/group education and peer socialization, ah nearly thirty I suppose and still showing off like in junior high about how tough her life is, show’s over, well actually my coffee order came up and I wander to the back of Safeway.

I’m peering through the display case but I see empty spots instead of slabs of salmon.

“Can I help you?” the pleasant voice rings from the stocking hatted and gloved young woman behind the case.

“What do you have for salmon?”

“Ooh, not much.”

“Oh, don’t say that, I need it to replace the Lutefisk.”

“That I have, I have lutefisk,” she says very brightly ready to serve.

“No!” my mind screams, “No! No! No! I was nearly home free!”

“You do?” my big mouth says humbly and quietly out loud.

“Yep, right here,” she announces as she reaches into the freezer compartment right behind her.

“Thanks,” I say, feigning true enthusiasm for her find.

“Not a problem, I’m glad I could help.”

I had to go to Wallmart to get wild caught salmon fillets large enough for the party. Sorry unionettes. Fortunately I didn’t run into Stupid Mom, her sad parents and slightly doomed children (God still works miracles Sweet Interpreter).